Strange day today.
I woke up with a stiff neck, shoulder pain and a headache to boot. I slept badly or rather I slept in a bad position I guess and dreamt alot of wierd stuff. Never good.
So instead of heading off this morning to see our friends for fun and frolics, I was stuck with the grey skies and drizzle as the view from my window.
Will spent the morning drawing and colouring on my bed, while i dipped into a book my good frind Han has lent me.
Birth Reborn by Michel Odent
I was left feeling choked up about my first birth experience, feeling grateful for my second and so lucky to have had the third and fourth in the most natural way that I thought possible.
It also left me feeling that if only I'd have known then what I know now, and that after my most wonderful and humbling experience last July, that more women should have access to the support and knowledge that is out there. Han had accessed a whole lot of resources using the web which enabled her to achieve her home birth after a disasterous first birth experience.
And then there is my neighbour who has just given birth to a big,bonny,baby boy and having talked about breastfeeding during her pregnancy has already succumbed to the I'm not producing enough mentality. He's only 2 days old! Her milk will not have come in yet. She's 'supplimenting' him with bottles for goodness sake. Already. Where is her support?
I know you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink, but is that not what is wrong with our society now. They do 'sex education' in schools and I know some offer child development GCSE but where is the teaching of what should be the norm?
Which brings me back to the Doula thing again.
In the absence of mothers and aunties and neighbours and close friends and communities, is this a viable option?
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5 comments:
Go, go, be a doula!!! Go on, go on, go on, go on. You'd be fab!
Thank you. I've actually been looking at courses again today and found one, with a space left that starts this weekend and isn't a million miles away!!!!! Just need to convince Rob that we should spend the money on it now. Not much warning I know, but hey, you know me! Mrs Spontaneity!
A friend of mine is a doula, unfortunately very sick with pgncy at the mo. But perhaps when she's better I could put you guys together. I'm sure she could talk you through pros cons etc and point you in the right direction.
Hi Carolyn, long time no see but I'm still here! Rushed off feet with children and life in general. I think you'd make a great doula, a calming presence, a wise woman.
I've realised something. I've had 5 births. 4 hospital, 1 home. 3 epidurals, 2 without epidurals. Only 1 birth was totally in the presence of other women(2 lovely midwives and my mum,) no men at all, and it was the best birth, hands down. No offence to the husbands who were present for the other 4 ofcourse, they were great. It just makes you wonder if the male presence, or at least only having a male partner present, somehow inhibits us. I have always felt strongly that I would be dismayed to be assigned a male midwife, maybe that's wrong? I think birth is just very much a female concern, the original "Women's work", as it were.
Just a few thoughts! Good luck with your doula aspirations,
Louise X
Sounds a good idea, BMF. Yes , we'll wait until she's not suffering though!
And Hi Louise!
I know what you mean. Although I had my partners present at all 4 of my births, there were 2 births where they were definitely in the background so to speak and those were the better births.
I think that it was not necessarily their presence that was the issue for the other two, but their lack of knowledge and understanding. Probably partly due to my own issues at the time.
But yes, I know where you are coming from and it was reading Anita Diamant's 'The Red Tent' that opened my eyes to so much last year.
I hope you are all well xx
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