Tuesday 22 December 2009

Birthdays, solstice and christmas!!!

So, here we are.
Everyone is talking about being ready for Christmas yet here we are still trying to concentrate on Tom's birthday, which is tomorrow.
But we have had to do christmas preparations. There have been presents to make, package up, wrap and parcel up to post. A special consignment was delivered to my good friend Han yesterday, while Rob and the smalls went to the post office with the parcels for further afield.
Rob and Jonathan have their birthdays and then I get lulled into a false sense of security that Tom's is a week away. I started doing christmas things, we talked about the winter solstice and then suddenly I rememeber that it is his birthday tomorrow!!!! Eeek!!! Birthday cake is quickly baked, plans thrown together. A few presents wrapped and cards hastily made. Food shoppping was done this afternoon and suddenly we are here.
This strange day which I always feel should be Tom's birthday. He was born in such chaos around midnight that noone really knows which day is his birthday. The people present (there were quite a few!) seemed to all agree on just after midnight (12:03 to be precise for the record), but to me it always seems wrong that it is tomorrow and not today. He should have been born before midnight, long before, but I won't go into detail about that here. Then he would have 2 days between his birthday and christmas and it would be right....I was in labour all that day and that is when I think about his passage in to this world.
I brought Tom home from hospital on a beautiful frosty Christmas Eve, 15 years ago. This was my first experience of birth and motherhood, both of which started out as a disaster, but I have arrived at Tom's 15th birthday feeling proud that I have made it through many difficult and testing times with him firmly by my side. He has turned into a very mature, sensible young man with a great sense of humour. He is always there to help, can always be relied upon and has always been and continues to be, my right hand man.
He is paving the way for his brothers and I just hope that he continues on this path he has chosen. It cannot be easy being the eldest of four boys....(it certainly isn't easy being a mum of four boys!!!) but he is doing just fine!!
So here I sit unable to do anything constructive this evening as is true of many an eve of Tom's birthday thinking about the whole experience and wishing I had known then what I know now. But despite the delayed and consequently forced entry in to this world, the terrible experience of breast feeding and the upheaval that he experienced as a baby; we moved house more times than I care to remember, and he went to a child minder as a very small baby (don't ask!!!) and many other things along the way, he has turned out ok!!
I may have screwed up in the beginning, but I must have done something right along the way! So tomorrow we will celebrate Tom's 15th birthday.
And from today the days are getting longer and that has got to be something worth smiling about! It is funny how I wasn't as desperate for the Winter Solstice as I thought I was going to be, because we have been having this beautiful snow and frost for the last few days. The sun has been shining, so the normal dull and dreary grey of winter hasn't been hanging over us. Yes, I could cope with winter if it was cold and frosty all the time. It is the grey and wet I hate so much.
We have a decorated tree now. Paper chains and snowflakes up. A winter seasons table. Lights up in the dining room and kitchen bringing the magic to the most used rooms in our house and preents all wrapped. So preparations done, many of the handmade gifts I planned have been finished, and now it is time to just look ahead and enjoy the festive season.
Merry Christmas to you all xxx

4 comments:

Carol said...

Happy Birthday to Tom and wishing you all a peaceful, relaxing, homely Christmas! We really hope we will se more of you all in 2010. Miss you! X

Carolyn said...

Why thank you Carol! Thank you for the lovely card...another masterpiece from your household of talented creative folk.
Missing you too xxxx

Big mamma frog said...

Happy birthday to Tom. We have a nearly-Christmas birthday in our house too...

Liz said...

What a lovely post, I almost cried! Thank you for the christmas card. I realised when it arrived that I had sent yours to your old address, so I don't know if you got it or not (doh!) but Merry Christmas anyway!